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How I Started Out

Updated: Sep 23, 2018

In 2017 I started a new job. I was full of anxiety, anger, and sadness. While the recent change had made things much easier for me in so many ways, it also brought my struggle into focus. I suddenly had the time and energy to see myself in a new way. And, for the most part, I didn't like what I saw. This was partly because I didn't know what I was doing and because I had cultivated bad habits. I started trying to make changes. I stopped going to therapy, I started saying no, and I tried to listen more than I talk.

Amongst my attempt to make these changes, a coworker started asking me personal questions that turned into my first readings. He pushed me to open up and not to be afraid. He pushed me to do more readings for him and he ultimately brought me my first client. Her reading was free and was not at all what she had hoped for in the end. Most importantly, he told me it was safe to follow your destiny. I'm sure he has no idea what he's done for me. I hope my continuous reading bring him as much guidance as he has brought me.

Scrolling through Instagram, I discovered a celebrity I follow doing a Tarot spread. I was amazed. I began researching this fantastic, artistic, mysterious art and bought by first deck that same night. The internet just kept saying, "do this, start this."

When I received them, I started reading. Hours and hours of research. It was incredible, I cared about something again! I cried at my own readings and I offered to do free readings whenever the opportunity arose. Everyone around me was my guinea pig. I made people laugh, I made them run away, I made them cry, and I made them uncomfortable. And we did it together.

Somehow, some unseen something, has brought me here. Sure I worked hard. I lost sleep and sacrificed my health before I truly knew what I was doing. But it's happening. It still surprises me when people say I'm, "the real deal." More than once I've been told that I've given them the best reading of their lives, and they've had plenty.

In the times when I doubt myself or feel like I don't deserve it, I hear a whisper: "You must."

And I continue. I've learned that I'm never alone. I communicate better. I am sad better. I am closer to my friends and family and I found happiness within me. I use my third eye to help others see it too. These journeys aren't easy. But the struggle is just as valuable as the success.

Photo by Dean



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